


I’m not broken?

by dipcrapjoseph



Series: Towards the Morning Sun [2]
Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Asexual Character, Asexual Josh Dun, Bisexual Josh Dun, Bisexuality, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Rape/Non-con Elements, Sad Josh Dun, Sexuality Crisis, Smut, biromantic, throwing up
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-27
Updated: 2020-12-27
Packaged: 2021-03-10 22:06:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,495
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28364382
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dipcrapjoseph/pseuds/dipcrapjoseph
Summary: the one where josh is a biromantic asexual and is trying to come to terms with it
Relationships: Josh Dun/Original Male Character(s)
Series: Towards the Morning Sun [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2077275
Comments: 2
Kudos: 3





	I’m not broken?

**Author's Note:**

> a prequel to It Doesn’t Matter but it can be read separately
> 
> Trigger Warnings:  
> rape/non-con  
> sex as self-harm  
> throwing up

Josh and Tyler had been friends ever since they were kids. 

They met at the park on day and spent the afternoon playing around in their own little world. Luckily for them, their moms also happened to bond enough to trade numbers and agree to get their boys together for a play date later. 

Their friendship stayed strong even through Tyler being homeschooled, drawing into himself and talking to his friend less and less; and Josh, getting wrapped up in a few questionable groups in public school, turning into a bit of a punk. 

After high school, both boys went to the same college, Ohio State, and decided to room together because both were nervous being in a strange place with unfamiliar people. 

College really is a time to try new things. Josh convinced Tyler to try drinking and smoking, but Tyler found it made him more anxious then anything and left it to Josh. When Josh would convince Tyler to go to parties, Tyler would be the DD, and he didn't mind. He actually enjoyed watching his friend have fun, he preferred it to losing his own senses. 

Yeah, sometimes he hated having to deal with his hungover best friend the next morning, but he felt oddly proud being able to take care of him, knowing that Josh trusted him. 

While Tyler was doing this, Josh was finding more about himself as well. He liked boys. 

He liked boys and he had no clue what to do about it. 

So, he went to parties. He smoked. He drank. At least then he could blame his feeling on the fact that he was under the influence. When he would flirt with guys at parties he could blame it on the substances. They were his excuse and relief. 

He was almost able to convince himself that he was only attracted to men when he was under the influence. But as time went by he started questioning more and more and it was driving him crazy. It was awful not to know wether what you were feeling was real or not. 

The first time Josh decided to truly test his attraction, he was at a party without Tyler. He was wearing black jeans and a black sweater with a while collared shirt underneath. He wore rings on almost every one of his fingers and had a thin line of black eyeshadow hugging his lower lash line as well as a light coat of mascara. He had a chain around his neck and one hooked to the belt loops so it would drape across his hip. His hair was a bright blue, standing out against his otherwise monochrome outfit. Josh started drinking, looking for someone that would draw his eye. 

Across the room he spotted a tall guy with deep chocolate hair. He has some facial hair and was very attractive. He wasn't lanky but he wasn't super buff and Josh hoped he took interest. 

By some miracle (or curse, Josh couldn't decide which) the guy came over to him as Josh was trying to hype himself up.

"Hey, how're you doing?" the man asked.

"Oh, I'm doing good," Josh paused for a second before adding "now that you're here." He internally cringed at himself for being so awkward.

The man seemed to take in in stride, continuing to ask, "I could say the same. What's you're name handsome?"

Josh blushed a bit, "Josh. What's yours?" 

"Finn," he gave him a warm smile, "what do you think of the party."

"It's good, there's more people then I expected though." 

"Well, what do you say we get out of here and find somewhere less crowded."

This was it, this is what Josh had come for, he just didn't expect it to be so easy. He had never done this but figured it would be his chance to finally confirm how he felt. 

"That sounds great," Josh responded, taking his time to glance over Finn's body, hoping it came off attractive and not creepy. 

"Follow me, hun," he reached for his hand and Josh took it gingerly. 

They maneuvered through the crowd, making their way up the stairs until Finn pulled Josh into a room. 

He immediately pushed Josh up against the door kissing him heatedly, letting his hand roam down Josh's sides before grabbing his belt loops and pulling his hips close. 

Josh froze for a second before kissing back, enjoying the feel of Finn's scruff against his face more then he thought he would. 

Josh felt Finn's tongue against his bottom lip and he gasped slightly, giving the other man the perfect opportunity to explore his mouth. 

Finn pulled Josh away from the door just enough to turn him around and walk him towards the bed before giving him a soft push onto it. 

Josh now sat with Finn standing above him, he put one hand under Josh's chin, tilting his head up, the other grabbing the hem of his sweater. "Let's take this off shall we."

Josh reached to take his shirt off as Finn stood up tall and took his own off. Both boys were sweaty and hard. 

Finn then reached down and palmed Josh through his jeans before starting to work on his belt, Josh letting out an involuntary moan as he did so. 

Truly though, Josh had no clue how to feel. On one hand he was excited, he had been fantasizing about this. He wanted to be with another man. He had to know. But on the other hand, part of him couldn't help but feel disgusted. His skin started to crawl and he didn't like it. However, he brushed it off as nerves and tried to focus on Finn starting to pull down his pants. 

He lifted his hips a bit, helping his pants come off easier. As soon as they were off Finn started kissing down his chest, making his way across Josh's defined v-line. 

As soon as Finn mouthed at the bulge in his underwear Josh threw his head back letting out a low groan at the feeling. 

Finn started pulling off his own belt, before pulling off Josh's underwear, freeing his cock, letting it curve up towards his stomach. 

"Josh, do you have lube?" 

Josh lifted his head up and nodded with a blush, "there's a pack in my jeans."

Finn went and grabbed it, shedding the rest of his clothing on the way back to the bed. He opened the pack of lube and drizzled some on his fingers before leaning back over Josh, pushing his legs apart. 

When he started circling his fingers around Josh's tight hole he couldn't help but tense and take a sharp inhale. 

Finn looked up at him, "have you done this before?" 

Josh kept his eyes closed and shook his head, "No, but keep going. please."

Fun put on if his hands on Josh's thigh, softly stroking up and down, "Try to relax. It'll get easier."

He then went back to circling Josh's hole, moving his other hand to rest on Josh's cock, starting to slowly stroke it. 

Josh shuddered before trying his best to relax, still not able to shake the gross feeling in his bones. 

Finn slowly pushed a digit in, pumping it in an out slowly. He waited for Josh to stop wincing before adding another. He started scissoring them getting Josh used to the feeling before curving his fingers up. He knew he found what he was looking for when Josh's whole body jolted and he took another gasped moan.

Finn chuckled a bit before continuing, "That feel good, baby?" Josh could only nod, letting out a broken groan as Finn started to massage his prostate. 

He worked Josh open a bit more before pulling out, leaving Josh empty and panting. 

He walked to his own pants, pulling out a condom, and ripped the package open before rolling it onto himself.

He walked back to the bed and leaned over Josh, giving himself a few tight strokes and starting to kiss Josh's neck as he lined himself up with his entrance. 

Josh still couldn't shake the awful feeling stirring in his stomach. Finn started to push in and Josh reached to wrap his arms around Finn, digging his nails into his skin at the burning sensation. 

They moved slowly, waiting for Josh to get more comfortable. Finn slowly started picking up speed and hooked his hand on Josh's thigh to move it up onto his shoulder. The change of angle made Finn's cock hit his prostate on every thrust and soon Josh was scrambling for purchase against Finn's back. 

The whole time, despite the pleasure he felt, all Josh could think about was when this was going to end. He found him self yearning for this to be done rather then yearning for an orgasm. He tried to let himself relax all the way but it seemed so very hard. 

Soon, Finn's thrusts started getting sloppy and he wrapped his hand around Josh's neglected cock, pumping in time with his thrusts.

Josh started to whine, arching his back as he came all over his stomach. Finn finished a few thrusts later, slowing down and listening to Josh's whimpers of oversensitivity. 

They laid there for a bit before he pulled out, walking to the connected bathroom and coming back with a damp washcloth. 

Josh layed there panting as Finn wiped the cum off of him, hissing when he brushed over his sensitive cock. 

"You ok, Josh?" he asked.

"Yeah, I'm good," Josh responded, not really feeling good at all. 

"Did I live up to your expectations," he asked with a warm chuckle.

"Yeah, yeah," Josh breathed, "that was great, I'm gonna be so fucking sore though." He chuckled, hoping to cover up his anxiety. 

Finn started collecting their clothes, placing Josh's next to him. "I, uh, usually don't do this but do you need anything? Maybe a ride somewhere?" 

Josh sat up, feeling an ache already shoot you his spine "Nah, don't worry about it. Thanks though." 

"Ok." Finn smiled, "It was nice meeting you, you were a great fuck."

Josh was stunned at the way he said it but figured that's what happens when you have a one night stand. He just smiled slightly at Finn before the other man awkwardly walked out the door. 

Josh put his clothes all the way on before flopping back onto the bed.

I just did that, he thought.

He didn't know if it was worth it. Hell he didn't even know if he enjoyed it. Sure he finished but he almost felt betrayed by his spent cock.

He felt betrayed by his pleasure. He felt betrayed that his body reacted the way it did while he felt like he did. He felt betrayed by the disgust flowing through his veins. 

He thought about it and he hated it. He hated what he just did. He felt awful. 

He felt something wet on his face and realized that he was crying. Josh didn't know wether they were sad or angry tears but they wouldn't stop.

He couldn't figure out why he was even upset in the first place. Nothing happened without his consent. Finn was gentle with him and he even finished with an amazing orgasm. Why did he feel so bad. Why did he feel so dirty.

He could almost feel the sludge making its way through his veins. 

He got up and walked to the bathroom and looked himself in the eye. His mascara was smeared from his tears and he looked like a mess. He splashed some water on his face before looking up into the mirror and feeing repulsed by his reflection. 

He stood there a bit before he felt the nausea rolling in his gut. He quickly moved over to the toilet and emptied his stomach until he was dry heaving. This made the tears come faster. 

Josh was upset and embarrassed by the way he was acting. He should be perfectly fine so what was messing him up?

Shakily, he wiped the last of his tears, making sure he looked presentable before he left.

He left the room and walked down the stairs, he walked into the kitchen and took a few more shots, hoping to get rid of the pit in his stomach. Once his nerves and anxiety started to fade and he felt generously inebriated he walked out of the house, starting his stumbling journey back to his apartment. 

He had no clue what time it was but it must've been late cause when he walked in the door Tyler immediately came out and walked over to him. 

"Dude where were you? I texted and called you and you didn't answer. You never ignore me." He asked, his eyebrows furrowing a bit. 

"Sorry, I uh guess I lost track of uh time," Josh said, not able to hide the slur in his words. Not that it would do much, he was unsteady on his feet, swaying slightly even as Tyler held him steady. 

Tyler looked as if he didn't believe him but luckily didn't push it, instead saying, "Let's get you to bed okay? You're gonna have a killer hangover."

Tyler led Josh to his room helping him out of his jeans and into bed. Josh looked up and saw him leave and started tearing up again, not able to stop his thoughts now that he was alone. 

Tyler came back in the room, carrying a glass of water and a bottle of painkillers. Josh quickly buried his face in his pillow, hoping Tyler didn't see. 

"Hey man, are you sure you're ok?" Josh heard Tyler ask.

"Yeah, I'm good," he replied, face still pressed to the pillow. He hoped the shake in his voice could be blamed on the alcohol. 

Tyler hesitated, "Ok. Come get me if you need anything." Then he silently left the room, closing the door on the way out.

Josh kept his head in the pillow, letting it soak up the steady stream of tears falling from his eyes. 

How could people like this. Maybe it was just the fact that it was the first time. He just wasn't used to it, because he did feel attracted to that man. Tonight confirmed his romantic orientation thats for sure. The kissing was so great and Josh found himself wishing that it could've stayed like that for so much longer. The soft touches lit him up and stirred something in him. Once clothes started to come off was when he had started feeling icky. 

Josh rolled over and stared at the glow in the dark stars on his ceiling. He found himself wishing that he could just be a star, existing to brighten the sky until his existence was done and he burned out. 

He spent a while staring, trying to figure out what was wrong with him, before falling into a disturbed sleep. 

-

When Josh woke up, sunlight was filtering in through the blinds, casting streaks on the floor. He sat up, wincing at the pain in his ass and back. He glanced over and saw a cup with water and painkillers, thanking Tyler for being so good to him. He took the pills and drank some water before standing up and heading towards his closet. 

He grabbed out a t-shirt and sweatpants before stripping his clothes from the night before. He glanced down at his hips and saw faint finger shaped bruised there as well as on his thigh. He looked away quickly so as not to trigger any more uncomfortable feelings. He quickly put the clean clothes on before walking into the kitchen to fetch more water. 

When he walked out Tyler was sitting at the table on his laptop. 

"Hey Josh, how're you feeling?" 

"Like my head is trying to combust," he said quietly, knowing that it wasn't only his hangover that was causing the migraine. 

"Yeah dude, you were pretty drunk last night."

"Yeah, it just kinda happened." 

Tyler chuckled before jokingly saying, "I don't really believe that but whatever you say. Be careful next time, man."

Josh didn't say anything, resorting to just getting his water and going back to his room. 

-

A few weeks passed and Tyler had noticed a distinct change in Josh's attitude. He stayed in his room except when he went out to parties. Tyler was worried about him, but didn't want to push him, he knew Josh would talk to him when he was ready. 

Around 5:00pm one day, Josh walked out to get his first meal of the day.

"I'm going out again tonight." Josh stated.

"Again?" Tyler asked, "you've gone out almost every day this week and you're always drunk off your ass when you come back."

Josh looked at him like he didn't know why it was a big deal, "Yeah, and? I want to go out." 

Tyler sighed, "Okay, I'm coming with you this time."

Josh froze, "You hate parties."

"Yeah but I care about you and I’d rather go and make sure you come home safe then let you wander off to God knows where." Tyler stated. 

Josh hesitated, thinking about his answer. He didn't want to agree because then he'd have to hide his habits from Tyler. But he didn't want to disagree because he didn’t want to make his friend get suspicious. Tyler knew he always would beg him to come and would never turn down Tyler's willing presence. 

"Fine, we're leaving at 9:00." Then he walked back to his room. 

-

Right before 9:00 the boys headed out to the party. It was at some house not to far from their apartment so it was a relatively short drive. They pulled up to the house and they walked up to the door. 

Once they got inside Josh immediately headed for the drinks, downing four shots right in a row. Tyler had never seen him go straight to shots, he usually opted for a beer or two before doing any hard liquor. 

Josh walked off, not even acknowledging his friend. Tyler decided to just watch from afar and intervene if anything happened. 

Soon Tyler noticed Josh approaching a man who was a good 5 inches taller then him. He was shocked whenever Josh started giggling and lightly touching the mans arm with his hand. Josh had a beer in his hand and Tyler watched in horror as the man ran his hand over Josh's drink while he wasn't looking. 

Tyler didn't see anything for sure but he wasn't going to risk his friend being drugged and taken advantage of. 

Tyler had been standing in the opposite side of the room and started trying to push his way through the crowd as fast as he could. The bodies were pressing in so tight and he was having a hard time getting through as he watched Josh down the rest of his drink before the man started leading Josh away from the crowd. 

He pushed through with more urgency, not even caring when people pushed back or cursed him out. He finally got to the empty hallway and saw as Josh entered a room and the door was shut. 

Tyler raced down the hallway to the door yanking on the door knob before realizing it was locked. he started banging on the door and yelling to be let it. 

He heard a groan from inside and started pounding hard enough to break the door down. 

Finally the door opened and the man stood there, shirt off and sweaty. "What the fuck are you doing, this room is taken, find your own place to fuck."

Tyler was filled with fury, "That's my fucking friend and you better not lay a single finger on him or I'm gonna beat your ass. Get the fuck out of here right fucking now." 

Tyler was never one to curse but he was filled with so much anger and rage that he couldn't help the expletives that fell from his tongue. 

Tyler then shoved his way inside before pushing the man out with all his strength and closing and locking the door once more.

Tyler turned around so he could face the bed. He saw Josh laying on his back, mumbling and turning his head back and forth. His shirt was off and his pants were undone but luckily it looked like Tyler had got there in time to stop anything further happening. 

He slowly approached Josh, not wanting to scare him, "Josh? Josh, can you hear me?"

Josh opened his eyes a bit and gave a slight nod but it was obvious he wasn't really aware of what was going on. 

Tyler walked up to his best friend and started to give him his shirt. "Josh I'm sorry but I have to get your pants back on." The man gave no sign that he heard him so Tyler went ahead and zipped and buckled his pants back up before helping him sit up. 

As Tyler started slipping Josh's shirt back on the drugged man slurred out, "Aren't you gonna fuck me?" 

Tyler's jaw dropped and he froze, "What? Josh no I'm not gonna do that. I would never- Josh you were drugged I can't- did you- did you want that man to?"

"I don't want any- anyone to. I don't like it, but other people love it so- so maybe I will if I try hard enough." Josh could barely string together his sentences right now and Tyler knew he had to get him out of here. 

"You're safe now Joshie, don't worry. Let's get you home okay?" Tyler replied, wondering what had been going on for his best friend to be saying these things. 

Once Josh was dressed Tyler got him up and started walking him out. It took a while to get to the car but he wasn't going to leave his friend alone. Tyler gently put Josh in the back, letting him stretch out across the seats. He seemed to instantly fall asleep, still under the influence of whatever drug that man had slipped him. 

The drive home was quiet, Tyler didn't bother turning on the radio, still trying to piece together what had happened. 

Tyler pulled up into their apartment complex before going around to help Josh get out of the car. After some struggle, Tyler got him inside and into his room. 

Josh was barely able to hold up his head, and Tyler didn't want to trigger him into anything by trying to change his clothes or get to close. 

He stood there, unsure of what to do until Josh spoke, "Why am I like this?" 

Tyler was confused, "Josh, you didn't do anything wrong." 

Josh shook his head before pausing to take a few gasping breaths. "No, you don't understand. I'm doing everything wrong and I can't make it better." Tears started falling down his face.

Tyler still didn't know what his friend was talking about and didn't want to make assumptions and say something that would upset him so he opted for, "Can I hug you?" 

As soon as Josh gave confirmation Tyler went towards and wrapped his arm around his friend, tucking him into the younger mans shoulder. 

Josh continued to cry as Tyler held him, whispering comforting words into his ear. He didn't want him to work himself into a panic attack. 

Josh sniffled, "I can't do this anymore. I cant- I cant- I cant." He kept repeating the phrase like a mantra. 

"Cant do what, hun?" Tyler asked softly. 

"This. I cant keep- keep letting people use me. I- I cant keep going out and finding random guys or girls to hook up with. I hate it. It makes me feel so dirty and- and like my insides are full of fucking sludge. Tyler, please, I cant do this anymore. I cant feel this way."

Tyler was taken aback. He had his suspicions about Josh's sexuality and his attraction to men but this had confirmed it a bit. However, he wasn't going to bring it up. Making sure Josh was comfortable and felt safe was his number one priority right now. He was, however, worried about his friends disdain for hooking up. It seemed to really be eating at him and Tyler wondered what had happened to make his friend feel this way. 

"Joshie, it's gonna be okay. I'll help you in anyway I can. You don't have to feel like that anymore it's gonna be okay, I promise." Tyler continued running his hands through his hair, letting Josh cling to him as if he would disappear at any second. 

After a while Josh started to calm down, his breathing evening out. "Do you wanna change into something more comfy and get ready for bed?" Tyler asked. 

"Mmhm," Josh mumbled. 

Tyler slowly untangled himself from josh and got up to grab josh some sweatpants and a sweatshirt. "Do you want me to leave?"

"No. No please don't leave." Josh responded quickly. 

"Okay Joshua, don't worry, I'm not going anywhere."

Once they had both gotten comfortable they laid down, Josh still clinging to Tyler's frame. Soft sniffling could be heard from Josh but it soon faded into deep breaths and a dreamless sleep. 

-

When Tyler woke up he found Josh's side of the bed empty. He glanced around and saw the bathroom door closed. He heard a gagging sound coming from the door and decided to go see if Josh was okay. 

He softly knocked on the door, "Josh? Bub, are you okay?"

"Don't come in here, I'm good," was all the younger heard before more retching started. Tyler felt awful for his friend.

"I'm coming in, let me help," Tyler slowly opened the door, heart breaking at the sight of Josh throwing his guts up. 

"Fuck you, i'm fi-," Josh couldn't even finish his sentence. Tyler moved over to run his hand up and down his friends back, trying to soothe him in any way possible. 

They stayed there for a while and Tyler was sure Josh had nothing left in his stomach. Tyler got the other a glass of water, having him sip it so as not to upset his stomach even more. 

Josh sunk down to the bathroom floor, leaning up against the cabinet before he started tearing up again. 

"Bub, what's wrong?" Tyler asked.

"Nothing." Josh said, his bottom lip wobbling, eyes getting misty, "can I be alone."

Tyler hesitated, "I don't know if that's a good idea Joshie, please talk to me. I'm so worried about you." 

Josh sat there quietly before breaking into heart wrenching sobs. Deep sobs that Tyler could feel in his bones. He slowly reached for Josh and his friend once again clung to him, burying his face into his neck. 

"Thank you, thank you, thank you." Josh started whispering through sobs. 

"For what hun?" Tyler responded. 

"For coming with me last night. I'm so sorry I put you in that situation. I'm so sorry if I made you mad or worried about me. Thank you for stopping him I could've- He could've- I was almost-," he started crying harder, piecing together his blurred memories from last night and realizing what could've happened. 

"Josh I would do anything for you. I just want you to be safe. Let me take care of you right now. You're safe now, bub."

"I'm sorry I've been going out and ignoring you. Please don't be mad." Tyler knew he was getting bad by the way he was constantly apologizing. That’s something that Josh always fell into whenever he was getting trapped in his own head. 

"Josh look at me," he lifted his head so they could make eye contact, "I'm not mad at you, you have no reason to be sorry you didn't do anything wrong. Everything is gonna be okay." 

They stayed sitting in the floor until Josh's sobs started to quite and his breath came more easily. 

"Josh?," Tyler started, "can you tell me what's been going on in that pretty head of yours. You don't have to say anything but if you feel comfortable I'd love to help."

Josh paused, not saying anything before taking a deep breath and saying, "I don't like sex," he stopped and Tyler waited patiently for him to continue. "I don't like sex and I think I'm broken. I never really liked the idea but I thought maybe if I just did it I'd get over my fear. I've also been struggling with um my sexuality I guess and I wanted to see if I was actually attracted to uh men, so I figured why not kill two birds with one stone. I decided to go hook up with someone and he was great, he really was but I still hated it and I cried after he left and threw up and I don't know why. Then I thought if I went out and let guys- let them fuck me or find girls to fuck I'd get used to it and like it but it just makes me feel so awful and dirty. I- I don't know what's wrong with me and I can't stop thinking about it. Maybe I'm just doing it to hurt myself. This is my punishment. I deserve to feel gross and awful and feel used. I'm just a broken body to fuck. And I’m so stupid I almost got-," Josh's voice broke, "I almost got raped because I was so stupid and just started throwing myself at men. I don't know what to do. I cant even fucking jerk off without making myself uncomfortable. How will anyone want to be with me if I can't give them pleasure. How is anyone gonna want to be stuck with someone so broken that they can't even fuck without being so filled up with disgust that they just break down. I just want to be normal. Why can’t I just like it and be normal."

Josh had started crying more and Tyler just held him. 

"Bub, you're not broken. Everyone likes different things and what one person likes someone else may not. Your feelings are valid and you don't have to suffer just because of your preferences. You will find someone who loves you and doesn't care about your sexual preferences. You are completely lovable and anyone would be lucky to have you in their life. I love you Josh, please stop hurting yourself like this." Tyler was in tears himself at this point. Unable to stop the raw emotions coming from him. 

Tyler truly did love Josh. He had loved him ever since they were kids. He had never told Josh how deep his emotions ran. Of course they had shared 'I love you's' over the many years they'd known each other. But Josh had always said it in a friend way, whereas Tyler meant it with his whole body and soul. He was beyond enamored with the older boy. 

Josh just shook his head, "I love you too, but I don't think you can fix this." 

They stayed in silence holding onto each other, searching for comfort in each other's arms. 

-

A few weeks passed. Every once in a while Josh would come home late, drunk off his ass and come to Tyler about how he "did bad again" and Tyler would hold him and keep him safe from the hurricane of thoughts in his head. Tyler would help him filter the sludge from his veins and unclog the cotton in his brain. 

Tyler hated seeing Josh like this but was glad he had started to confide in him. 

One day Tyler was looking on the internet for ways that he could help Josh when he stumbled across a queer website. He clicked on it and read the article deciding that he would show it to Josh as soon as he woke up. 

When Josh came stumbling into the living room Tyler called him over, "Josh, come look at this real quick."

"What is it Ty?" 

"Just come look."

Josh rolled his eyes playfully before walking over to sit next to Tyler. He read the screen and felt his eyes start to water. 

Asexual  
Love doesn't equal sex.  
It's important to remember that asexuality is an umbrella term, and exists on a spectrum. Asexual people – also known as "Ace" or "Aces" – may have little to no interest in having sex, even though most desire emotionally intimate relationships.

Josh continued reading, finding other people who had asked some of the same questions he had been asking himself. 

He realized that he wasn't alone and there were other people who felt the same way as him. 

He turned to Tyler, misty eyed, lip wobbling, but with a smile on his face, "I'm not broken?" he asked quietly. 

"Josh, bub, you were never broken." Tyler responded. 

Josh started crying and launched himself at Tyler, both of them happy crying, knowing that things would get better.


End file.
